In the main host Ritash’s own words they felt – (Re)energised & inspired by this fantabulous & intimate conversation with Sandra & Hayathi on “Ace”ing Diversity.
I felt very honoured to be introduced as a “celebrity” – see this clip in the video below, or click here https://youtu.be/2iUE4Dm-Ghk
It was one of the most raw, real, authentic, interview discussions I’ve ever had.
“Ace”ing Asexual Diversity, Self-love, Intimacy, Touch Sensitivity, Body Confidence, Non-conformity, covered a wide range of topics:
I was asked about my bestselling Asexual Perspectives book and why I wrote it. – If you haven’t yet got a copy, you can get yours here https://amzn.to/48bZR2C
We talked about Self-love – Including what that looks like and what actions you can take to self-love / self-love more.
Self-worth, body confidence, self-trust, self-respect, being your own cheerleader and best friend and so much more was discussed under “self-love”.
We talked about self-dating and the fact that on Feb 14th 2015 I founded International Celebrate Being Single Day.
We discussed why it’s good to be happy being single, while also being open to a relationship if wanted, and other types of connections.
We talked about being touch sensitive / averse.
We dived into sensual attraction vs sexual attraction.
We discussed arousal and sexual behaviour without sexual attraction.
You wanted NO BS dating and relationship advice inclusive of asexuality – well here it it – Asexualise Dating now has an official channel all of it’s own. So you can go straight to the heart of the matter and get all the dating and relationships advice you need in one place. Subscribe here now https://www.youtube.com/@asexualisedating and hit the bell icon so you never miss a video.
If you’re subscribed to my main channel https://www.youtube.com/asexualisemyasexuallife you will know I do a mixture of asexual information, education, entertainment and lifestyle videos. This channel includes a regular chat show where you can ask me any questions you like, live in chat. And I help asexuals with love, life, confidence, dating, relationships, self-love and self-care. As I cater for asexuals across the asexual spectrum, some asexuals who never want to date or have a relationship – feel they don’t need this kind of advice (although they can still find it interesting and some of the things I talk about are relevant to any kind of relationship – such as friendships, so it’s still extremely helpful and valuable advice). Whereas other asexuals want more of these types of videos.
Some of my most watched videos on my main channel are my dating and relationships advice ones. And I did a survey to find out how many people would be interested in a new channel dedicated to just dating and relationships and an overwhelming majority said yes they would, so here it is.
Watch the intro video above and the videos below, and don’t forget to subscribe. Please note, I have purposefully included my aim with this Asexualise Dating channel to incorporate sexuals as well as asexuals – this includes heterosexuals. The reason for this is to fulfil my life mission of getting asexuality recognised as an official sexual orientation in it’s own right throughout the globe, so that no asexual lives in fear of ridicule ever again. I believe the only way of fully achieving this is to get the acceptance of the majority world population sexual orientation – that is heterosexuals, to make real and lasting impactful change on a world-wide scale.
There is lots of work being done, not just by me, but by many other asexual activists to unite asexuals with each other and to provide a relatable sense of community, but we don’t need to convince each other that asexuality is real and exists, we know it does. Where we need to make a change is within the heterosexual community and general population at large – which is where I come in…
I have been in heterosexual relationships for over half of my life, and I had my first asexual relationship at just 6 years old. I was passionately kissing my boyfriend at that age!!!! And he wanted to do sexual exploration and I felt really uncomfortable and invaded as I knew it was wrong. At 17 years I saw the college counsellor and told her about this and she didn’t understand why I was so upset about it and she dismissed and invalidated my feelings by saying it was just “doctors and nurses” and normal, but I knew it wasn’t. I thought I was heterosexual for years, but it’s clear looking back at that moment, that I was born asexual but didn’t realise it. That didn’t stop me having other heterosexual relationships in my teens and for years to come and I’m an asexual who has had sex in the past, because that’s what I thought I had to do as part of a “normal” relationship, I didn’t realise I had a choice not to do that and that there were others in the world like me, until I discovered I’m asexual in 2014. As I write this, I’ve currently been sex free for coming up to 12 years – thank God, that makes me so happy.
However, I still haven’t found my asexual soulmate who I believe is Indian – I’ve been on the dating scene now since 2014 – that’s 9 years and I’ve learnt a lot in that time, both about the people on dating sites and dating apps, how to actually get dates and how to avoid getting into a relationship with an abuser or narcissist. I’ve learnt about love languages, attachment styles, how childhood trauma can affect relationships, about consciousness and ego and about what’s game playing and what isn’t, and now I can use all of this experience to help asexuals and help sexuals to be better too. So I can bring both asexuals and sexuals together, to foster understanding and help asexuals come out as their beautiful selves by enabling sexuals to accept asexuality is very real and that we offer valuable and unique insights into dating and relationships, which are worth knowing about.
In this video, which I broadcast on Asexual Awareness Week (21st-27th of Oct 2018), I explain why it is much better for you to value your worth and walk away sooner rather than later. I speak of red flags, inconsistencies of behaviour, and a lack of investment in you! If there are any red flags it’s much better for you to value your worth and walk away sooner rather than later. Look out for these red flags!self
So you may be wondering as an asexual why I am talking about the difference between having sex and making love, well you will need to watch the video to find out, but all I can say is it seems many heterosexuals don’t understand the difference even. It took me ages to get it, and then the penny dropped!
If you are ever attempting to have a relationship with a sexual and you think you will even a tiny bit contemplate having sex at some point, this video is an absolute must watch for getting at least some satisfaction out of the experience – even if it’s not totally in the conventional sense!
Hope you find this video helpful, useful, and insightful? If you do, please subscribe to my channel, hit the thumbs up on this video, and hit the bell icon so you get notified of every time I post a new video or go live! And be sure to share this video with a friend or anyone who may benefit from it!
Above is a video with me talking about it, that was a live stream recording!
I am really proud to be featured talking about asexuality dating. Since being a speaker at the UK Asexuality Conference, I am on the Asexuality.org (AVEN) Media and Speaker team, so very proud of that!
November 5th 2018, marked the 7 year anniversary of me being free from abuse, and to celebrate I went on a self-date to the cinema and saw Disney’s The Nutcracker and the Four Realms. Which was an amazing family film. It is very Christmassy, with magic, wonder, beautiful costumes and sets, and some nicely simple special effects that were great for the film. Here is the trailer:
My ex was verbally, emotionally, and mentally abusive, and also physically threatening. Fortunately, he was not sexually abusive, and was good to me in that way.
In this video above, you can hear what I had to say about my past experience and how happy I am now to be free of that abuse, and living as a single, happy person.
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