Even though Pride is this Month, I did an Asexual Confidence and Self-Love Building Workshop for Exeter Pride last month.
Attendees loved the workshop and multiple aspects of the workbook I provided for it. The only thing they said to improve it would have been to have more time next time, as the one hour time slot was too short.
One person told me by email and at the end, they could have done the workshop all day – The workshop was an hour long, but it started a little late as some people attended that didn’t register, and even the security volunteer who was asexual stayed in the room to attend, so it was a more than fully booked event.
I could have easily had enough material for doing way longer than even 2 hours with all the sharing attendees wanted to do added in and me answering their questions, both about the concepts in the workbook and the personal questions they had as a result about the things they were learning in the workbook and how those applied to their own life.
As asexuals don’t often get to meet up in person, there was a lot of sharing, which is great, because it means attendees felt safe in the environment I had created for them.
Just from the introductions about where people fall on the asexual spectrum, people were sharing about their asexual life and how they felt about being asexual and different. To have a workshop just for us I know felt incredible from the energy and feedback in the room and it was much needed.
I also had one attendee who stayed in the room to still ask me a lot of questions they had about asexuality in their own life, privately, after everyone else had left. They were speaking to me for at least another 10 – 15 minutes. So the fact my session was at the end of the day, was helpful in that regard.
Each person (except the security volunteer Kevin who was an extra to the total amount of room attendees I had allowed for), had a 27 page Asexual Confidence and Self-Love Workbook to use and take home, a set of my 14 slides, a feelings ice-breaker, and to make it fully inclusive of autistic people – 4 different coloured fluorescent stars – with words on them, which were what they could hold up if they didn’t want to speak. These said things like: help, feeling overwhelmed, slow down, and repeat. I also provided smiley faces on lollipop sticks, with the word “share”, if they wanted to hold that up to share, rather than verbalising. I gave these out to everyone to be equal and fully inclusive, with verbal instructions on how to use them at the beginning of the session, (along with explaining about the handouts). Although people didn’t directly use these, one person loved the inclusivity so much they asked to take a photo of those things, and a couple of people took the lollipop smilies home as a souvenir of the workshop. It’s not very often asexuals get together and so this workshop meant the world to them and was a very special experience. I think just having these autism friendly things in the workshop, whether people used them or not, put the whole group at ease.
The 3 volunteers I was assigned were absolutely incredible and I could not have asked for better support. As I have anxiety myself, it really helped, especially at the beginning with getting settled in and setting up, and with the unexpected attendee arrivals and getting a wheelchair user with their friend in and out of the room.
After the event, I sent a survey out and got these 2 testimonials:
“Invaluable resource for asexual people, it was the first time I’ve ever met other people like me, gave me hope that there are resources out there to help me navigate my sexuality and live a happier life.”
“An excellent workshop that helped me face up to being Asexual. It’s a real orientation. If you think you might be Asexual then you most probably are!”
Let’s hope asexuals have a dedicated workshop another year.
Before running the workshop, I attended Exeter Pride Parade and here is the full-length video of that – with me wearing the asexual flag:
If you want a highlights video only, watch this one here:
Stay ACE.
Sandra xx
