ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES 47 ASEXUAL STORIES
5 STAR BOOK REVIEW
Did you miss this?? #APAM Video One in my Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month series – A new video out every day for 31 days!!
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Asexual Perspectives – Feeling Singled Out in the Asexual Community? We Should Celebrate Our Diversity!! #APAM When I was told by a member of Aven that I could not identify as a Heteroromantic Grey A, because I did not fit the ‘Grey A’ definition, I felt singled out. I had others private message me, that they were also told they could not identify themselves as they liked too. And that is what prompted me to write my Asexual Perspectives book, I thought we should be celebrating our diversity across the spectrum, not tearing each other apart. So in order to understand the huge spectrum of asexuals and the nature of asexuality more, and to bust through myths and stereotypes about asexuality, I thought we really need a book with a diverse range of asexuals all across the spectrum, to gain better understanding of the spectrum as a whole and celebrate our diversity!
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Official channel Asexualise Your Asexual Life: Empower And Enhance Your Asexual Life. Giving Asexuals a voice in the world. It is my mission to give asexuals a voice in the world; to empower other asexuals to be comfortable and confident with their asexuality; and to give insight into my colourful asexual life, to enable others to better understand their own and to know they are not alone. I want to educate others about asexuality, so that in the future, all asexuals can live in society happily.
I am Sandra Bellamy. I identify as a Heteroromantic, Grey A, Asexual (younger) Cougar, who personally does not like sex, marriage or kids. I run the Asexual Business, Gurus and Entrepreneurs group and Facebook, that is an open group exclusively for asexuals – putting business and asexuality firmly on the map together. I have a strong business side to my nature and a quirky teenager/ kid side.
In the video, is probably my biggest YouTube fan, and he is unboxing a copy of my Asexual Perspectives book, watch this video as he comes alive with the joy of receiving it!
Finally, the print paperback version of my 560 page Asexual Perspectives book is now available to buy on Amazon here http://amzn.to/2u1wp0O. Or UK site http://amzn.to/2tw739A
The Kindle version of my Asexual Perspectives book, you can get here http://amzn.to/2szjNJQ Or UK site is http://amzn.to/2u6vps7. Please leave a review on Amazon to help other asexuals and to raise more awareness of asexuality.
To celebrate this book going into print, our diversity across the spectrum, and our individuality within it, I founded Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month, 1st-31st of July 2017, #APAM. Like www.facebook.com/acexualise to join in the celebration fun and subscribe on www.youtube.com/c/asexualisemyasexuallife to see a different video every day, for 31 days of #APAM, related to a topic from the book that matters to you and join in the conversation!!
It took me a year to interview for Asexual Perspectives book and write it, in the Kindle version, and a further 6 months to get it into print. I was super excited to receive my proof copies of Asexual Perspectives book this week!!
In time for #APAM, ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES AWARENESS MONTH which started on 1st July and goes on until 31st of July. Don’t forget for this special month there will be a new video every day for 31 days. Subscribe to Asexualise My Asexual Life at www.youtube.com/c/asexualisemyasexuallife and like www.facebook.com/acexualise to join in the fun.
In conjunction with the printed version of my Asexual Perspectives book being published in print, to celebrate our diversity across the asexual spectrum, and our individuality within it – A central core message from the book – I have founded Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month from 1st-31st of July 2017. (Please use #APAM in your Tweets and social media to join in the celebration.) Like www.facebook.com/acexualise and www.facebook.com/acexualisedating and follow me on Twitter, at www.twitter.com/asexualise to join in the celebration. There will be quotes from the book, fun challenges you will want to get involved in, videos, Facebook Lives, posts and more!! Also subscribe to www.youtube.com/c/asexualisemyasexuallife to watch a new video every day for 31 days!
I love www.asexuality.org as I have made some great friends on there, I think it is an amazing community and I organise asexual meet-ups in my city of Exeter in the UK too. However, after being told in a forum thread by a member of the community, that I could not identify as a heteroromantic Grey A – because I did not fit the Grey A definition as they saw it, I felt rejected and singled out by that individual, and other people said in a PM that they had had similar experiences. I thought this can’t be right, we should be celebrating our diversity across the spectrum and our individuality within it, not tearing each other apart – and this is what sparked the idea for my Asexual Perspectives book. I wanted to show just how wonderful our diverse spectrum is and get different points of views from across the spectrum, on love, life and sex, and to also bust through the many myths and stereotypes about asexuality, to give better understanding towards one another. (More recently, I even got told I could not identify as an asexual cougar by someone in my own Asexual Friends www.facebook.com/groups/acefriendsrus because they did not like the word cougar!!) I really hope this Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month, and this book, can bring us together more as a community!!
The printed version will be available to buy on Amazon next month 560 pages of acesomeness!! Here is the link to the Kindle version! http://amzn.to/2tPxFAJ
After painstaking months of working with the typesetter on my Asexual Perspectives book from January until around the end of March/beginning of April, and still having typesetting issues that needed to be sorted, and having spent another 3 nights last week, working on all those issues, I am relieved that I could finally print this final 560 page book proof, before I order a copy to check from Amazon, so I can finally hit the publish button to the world. Not long to go now… I cannot wait to hold this book in my hand!!
I must have edited it well over 15 times, considering all the editing I did prior to the typesetting, and it has gone through a final proof read and edit these past two days, and I am doing the typing up of those as we speak. I love writing but all the book formatting stuff is tough!!
Making a full-time living out of writing, is my dream, and my hugest passion is for asexuality, I really want to write more books for asexuals, as this is my huge specialist niche and I truly believe that I am born to get asexuality recognised as a sexual orientation in its own right throughout the globe, so that no asexual have to live in fear of ridicule ever again. The more people who buy, share, like, and give good reviews for this Asexual Perspectives book, the more that will help with this. I really need more amazing reviews, so when you get a copy, please could you leave one? It will really help me out!! Thank you!!
With 560 pages of insights into asexuality and how asexuals survive in a sexualised world; how they manage their relationships, and busting through many asexual myths and stereotypes about love, live and sex; including arousal and masturbation, it will be an intriguing read and answer many questions you may have about asexuality that are constantly on your mind, causing you confusion and frustration! It is told in the voices of 46 different asexuals around the globe, using their own language, dialects, slang and mannerisms! As well as my own. It took me almost a year to interview for it; write/edit it, so you are getting more book for your buck!! It is not only educational, but humorous too!!
Until next time, check out the Kindle Version and stay ace! xx
UPDATE: Asexual Perspectives Print Edition is out now and you can buy it here https://amzn.to/2Pl6aJd
1) Asexuals usually hold friendships in high regard, so you will feel valued if they are your friend.
2) Asexuals will focus on getting to know the inner you, so you will feel you are important to them.
3) Asexuals see the world in a way that other’s don’t, and that is a special gift.
4) Asexuals often like to keep busy with various activities and hobbies, which makes conversation with them, interesting and stimulating.
5) If an asexual invites you out for coffee to get to know you, they literally mean what they say, and they are not trying to get into your underwear!!
6) Asexuals will not be trying to constantly impress you based on their looks, so you want sex with them; as they ususually don’t want sex and don’t ‘need’ it.
7) Asexuals are often different and quirky, and therefore make interesting characters.
8) Asexuals know what it feels like to be in a minority, so are often empathetic to others who feel alone or singled out.
9) Many asexuals are kind; caring and friendly, and value those who share those traits.
10) Many asexuals are strong and tough, because they have often come up against resistance to being different.
What other things make asexuals beautiful? Share in the comments below and stay ace xx.
1) Asexuals won’t ‘need’ you to ever have sex with them. You do not have to worry about performing in the bedroom – you can be tired and actually have an early night’s sleep.
2) Asexuals are usually much more understanding of your emotional needs. Because asexuals often love through a strong and deep emotional connection, if the trust is built up, they are more likely to be able to give you that deep emotional connection that often sex led relationships lack. Besides people having affairs for sex, they often have affairs because after the initial fizz has worn away, there is a lack of emotional intimacy. Partners start to see flaws; they cut down on their conversations and being open and honest about things with each other. They lose that emotional connection that both need in order to survive a long-term relationship. Asexuals pose less of a risk in this way.
3) Asexuals will take their time in getting to know you as a person and your personality. Looks can change, and if you base a relationship on that and not on mutual respect and helping each other become the best version of you that there can be, it will be a painful and heart-wrenching experience, which ultimately won’t last.
4) Because sex is not a focus of the relationship, asexual relationships will often be based on shared interests, hobbies, and things in common. Which is a strong foundation for a longer-lasting relationship.
5) Asexuals will not have a sexual affair, or go off with someone else, because of a lack of sex.
6) Asexuals often make the best of friends because they value friendship highly. And this is great, because a good, solid, and trustworthy friendship, is a solid foundation for a long-term and long-lasting relationship.
7) Because asexuals are no focused on sex, they often pursue a lot of creative interests, have multiple hobbies and intellectual simulations. Many have a playful nature. This means that there is often always something to talk about and life is never boring.
8) As asexuals do not base their worth on how sexy they can be, or how sexy you are, this means you can relax and show the true you more.
9) Asexual relationships are often less superficial, because much of the ground work will have been done as to compatiblity before you became an item, and you are more likely to have more indepth conversations with them about all matter of things because sex is not a focus in their mind.
10) Asexuals are often different from the norm and this can be exciting and stimulating. Their take on the world is unique and although we share the commonality of the lack of sexual attraction, we are all very different in our personality, our wants, needs, likes and dislikes. Which makes a finding a compatible asexual, very rare and special. If you are lucky enough to find one, hang onto them forever. Because they are the precious gem you have been waiting for – all of your life!
Some people will tell you what to do, they will tell you how to live your life and they will make you feel small, if you don’t comply. But you are not a robot, and you are not them. Live your life the way you want and live your dreams!!
My birth certificate age is not a true reflection of who I am. I like to live like a quirky teenage girl and love thinking, being and acting, like a now ’21 year old’. Last week I was at Disneyland Paris for my 21st Mindset Birthday. I wore a large 21st Birthday badge on my actual day of birth (24th of April), whilst going on the rides at both Disneyland and Walt Disney studio parks, that are at the same resort, and I only had two people question it. I spent 4 nights and 5 days at the resort, (2 nights in London), and I loved every minute of it. I was at total peace and at one with my soul there. I am an energetic, bubbly and lively girl, and a minority extrovert within the asexual community. So to be out and about with people around me, and experience the energy from the music, lights, and action of the rides, felt incredible!
In order to live your best life you should:
Check out my video – Disneyland Paris 25th Anniversary Shopping Spree Haul!!
Until next time, stay ace!!
Can An Asexual Still Be Sexy? This is a great question. There are many myths and stereotypes about asexuality, and just because someone is asexual, does not meant to say that someone cannot find you sexy. Sexy is a matter of perception by the person experiencing that feeling.
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